Published on October 23rd, 2012 | by Chris1
Iron Eagle II (1988)
Remember when I recently reviewed the original Iron Eagle and said, "hey, its really not all that bad!" Remember?
Well, after watching the second installment, I recall why I put these movies up on the list of Worst War Movies. Iron Eagle II is a fiasco. Not a fiasco of epic proportions, but possessing just enough WTF?! to bump it into the list.
First off, the plot. Poor Dougie from the first movie gets killed (or did he? hmm.) over the Bering Straits because he was being a cocky dumbass. Don't stray into enemy airspace screwing around, kids. His wingman, Cooper (Mark Humphrey) manages to escape.
OK, now back to reality. Cooper has been picked to be a part of a joint US-Soviet task force (what?) designed to eliminate an unnamed middle-eastern nuclear threat (what? cue the remake.) Also part of the US section of this squad are a few other screwups and misfits. The Soviet side is made up of typical hardcore Russians like Lebanov (Colm Feore) and the requisite hot-yet-capable female pilot Valeri Zuyeniko (Sharon Brandon.) Oh, and it looks like Lebanov was the one who shot down Dougie. Natch.
Did I mention the Soviets all show up in their top secret Mig-29s? Which, by the way are simply dressed up F-4 Phantoms, probably a good 25 years old when the film was made. Whoops. Granted MIG's would have been hard to come by in 1987, but, really? Something that at least looks like it would have been better. Then there's the pair of (that's right two) "supertank" APC's they bring in to help with the mission. Have you noticed a trend yet?
They train, get into arguments, get the mission scrubbed, decide in true Iron Eagle fashion to just go ahead with the mission without clearance (good luck with that!) and of course save the day. Yay! In between the training missions, there is just random events trying to either make fun of the Russians or otherwise point fingers at the differences between us and them.
Unfortunately this time is even sillier than the original Iron Eagle. At least that had a kickass soundtrack, and was mostly just good brainless fun. This isn't even fun. And the soundtrack is lame. Paired up with the forced romantic sideline between Cooper and Zuyeniko, the forced tension between Cooper and Lebanov..... it's just, well, silly. The final straw is the final battle. Which is such a festival of fake silliness that it can't be overlooked. The only saving graces are that there are lots of military aircraft in action, and lots of explosions.
I wish I could say this was at least funny in a "so terrible" kind of way, but it was just too laughable to recover. I have to go 1.5/5 here for Iron Eagle II. While its always nice to see F-4's in action, dressing them up as Soviet MIG's, with blatantly incorrect insignia is just going too far. The Soviet connection does earn this one a slot in the "Cold War Movies" category, though.
Iron Eagle 2 (star)(artisan)
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A U.S. general recruits a jet pilot for a U.S./Soviet mission to destroy a Mideast missile site.
DVD InformationBinding: DVD
Aspect Ratio: 1.33:1
Audience Rating: PG (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Brand: GOSSETT,LOUIS JR.
Manufacturer: Lions Gate
Original Release Date:
- Louis Gossett Jr.
- Mark Humphrey
- Stuart Margolin
- Alan Scarfe
- Sharon Brandon
- Factory sealed DVD
Summary: Unfortunately this time is even sillier than the original Iron Eagle. At least that had a kickass soundtrack, and was mostly just good brainless fun. This isn't even fun. And the soundtrack is lame.