Published on September 18th, 2012 | by Chris6
Invasion USA (1985)
(Reviewed as part of the Worst War Movies Challenge)
Remember when Chuck Norris made awesome movies?
Yeah, me either. But that's not the point. The point is I have to flee to Canada now so Chuck won't find me for that statement. No.
The real point is that Invasion USA doesn't have a point. Except to be a Chuck Norris vehicle of destruction. I guess you could even classify this as a "cold war" movie. Sort of.
See, there's this Russian mob guy, Rostov (Richard Lynch), who starts off the film in a bad drug deal gone worse. Then, suddenly, and without reason (that I could see, maybe I blinked) he's leading an army of ragtag russian thugs in an amphibious landing in south Florida.
Where, as luck would have it, one former "agency" (I don't think they said which one) man Matt Hunter (Chuck!) is wrastling gators in the Florida swamp. Which, of course, is what Chuck does in his spare time. Turns out that Rostov and Hunter are old friends, I mean, enemies. He's drawn kicking and screaming back into the fight after Rostov finds his swampy house (how? I dunno, does it matter?) and destroys it and his pet armadillo. (one of the better points of the film.)
The rest of the film chronicles the advance of these Russian thugs as they rape and pillage their way from the 'glades to Atlanta. Blowing up innocent middle class suburban houses with a rocket launcher. Seriously. With Chuck in hot pursuit. I know I'd seen this at some point in my past, as the truck chase through the shopping mall scene rang familiar for some reason....
But leave it to good old Chuck, I mean Hunter to dispatch Rostov (point blank with a rocket launcher, didn't even get any on his shirt!) to end the movie. Well, the entire tank column might have helped some. That surrounded the ONE building where ALL the baddies went into. Yeah, what?
I see this movie gets a lot of good reviews. Really? Are you kidding me? I think these people are just afraid of the Norris mythos. That he'll show up on their doorstep, "Uh, did you rate my movie as bad?" and then destroy them Chuck Norris-style. Honestly it is schlock after schlock, written by 14 year olds for 14 year olds. I facepalmed through about half of it. It might have been better, if there had been some reason for this invasion.... But like I said, I didn't see it. Maybe I blinked or forgot to pause it while I got a drink or something?
Good thing I have a few more of Chuck's films up my sleeve for this!!!
I have to give it one full star, though, just because its so hilarious at times. Not even in a tongue-in-cheek "No we aren't serious" kind of way, but in a "I can't believe somebody wrote this" kind of way.
Don't believe me? Here! Enjoy!
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Chuck Norris himself cowrote Invasion U.S.A., a movie that's partly a right-wing paranoid fantasy and partly a prescient vision of contemporary terrorism. A Soviet superagent named Rostov leads an invasion of guerrilla squads who, after landing in Florida, spread throughout the U...
DVD InformationBinding: DVD
Aspect Ratio: 1.85:1
Audience Rating: R (Restricted)
Manufacturer: MGM (Video & DVD)
Original Release Date:
- Chuck Norris
- Richard Lynch
- Melissa Prophet
- Alexander Zale
- Alex Colon
- Factory sealed DVD
13 of 13 people found the following review helpful
This review pertains to the Shout Factory special edition bluray.,
This review is from: Invasion U.S.A. [Blu-ray] (Blu-ray)The 1985 Chuck Norris vehicle "Invasion U.S.A." is one of the craziest and most over the top action films from that glorious decade. What makes the film such a memorable artifact of that bygone era is that everybody was dead serious about this film and there was no tongue in cheek humor or satiric style like what was featured in "Commando" which also was released the same year which makes "Invasion U.S.A." even funnier in its own way.
Directed with verve and aplomb by Joseph Zito with makeup work by Tom Savini as well as featuring a script co-written by Chuck Norris, it is never boring and features some stupendous & brutal action pieces alongside a nutty performance by the equally nutty Richard Lynch as the villain. Don't go looking for the film to make a lick of sense plot wise at times. Just look at the cover art of Chuck Norris dual wielding machine guns which is all you need to tell you what kind of film you are in for.
"Invasion... Read more
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
THE ONLY CHUCK NORRIS FILM TO GET SPECIAL EDITION TREATMENT ON BLU-RAY, NEW EXTRAS,
This review is from: Invasion U.S.A. [Blu-ray] (Blu-ray)Most of the Chuck norris films from the 80's are now on blu-ray by MGM who still owns the rights to the films
LONE WOLF MCQUADE, CODE OF SILENCE, MISSING IN ACTION 1 & 2, DELTA FORCE, INVASION USA
are now on blu-ray by MGM but have the same content as the very old dvd versions, meaning no new extras
all you will get is the Original theatrical trailers on these blu-ray reissues
if anything, MGM made the effort with giving new HD transfers to the films that's it
and MGM also boosted the sound quality for the films from Mono sound to Master stereo mix which does sound slightly better
than the old Mono sound, so obviously MGM made some effort with quality of the films, but didn't bother with the extras
for some reason they just didn't want to add new extras, making of featurette or new interview with Chuck norris
maybe Chuck norris doesn't like to be interviewed for the films he did with Cannon, it's anybody's guess why
So Shout factory... Read more
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
What can I say, it is 1985 and it is Chuck Norris.,
This review is from: Invasion Usa (DVD)
it is 1985 and here we have Chuck Norris, the government gives him Carte Blanche to deal with a band lead by Richard Lynch who is trying to take down the US of A. Chuck will have none of that especially since he captured the bad guy one other time but was not allowed to finish him off, Chuck was right and now look at the mess we are in! We also get the pretty reporter who helps him out. Now having said that it is the typical 1980's chuck Norris thing where even though 50 guys are shooting at him with machine guns....no one gets close. is this mindless drivel....yes, yes it is. but this movie for some reason has become something of a cult classic. It is the usual mix of mayhem and the usual type of Golan/Globus bad production and bad editing and bad most other things too, but strangely we like it. My personal favorite line from Chuck " i'm going to hit you with so many rights, you will beg me for a left!" HAHA.
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